More to The Attitude in Confucian Mindfulness 克己慎獨, 忠恕, 戰戰兢兢

I found another chapter in the book, The True Teachings of Confucianism (孔教真理). This chapter is named "Restrain Yourself and Be Careful When Alone” (克己慎獨). In this chapter, Saint Zengzi explains more about the attitude of Confucian mindfulness. It is about not giving in to our desires and being very careful when we are in a place where no one can hear or see us. That place is our minds.

Some of the many meanings of a lotus flower are wisdom and awareness. Photo by Zoltan Tasi on Unsplash

Saint Zengzi imparts: Solitude is a private space. No one knows about it but you. So, where is the place? It is in your heart. It is also the same place where you can find the truths of Heaven. My teacher is a saint, but how did he become one? Whenever I was with him, I watched him closely. I didn’t see him do anything unusual. He just paid close attention to his inner space, and he made sure nothing could disturb it. That sacred space in his heart held the truths of Heaven. When he was with others, my teacher was responsive in every situation, and he balanced being kind with being responsible with grace. But in his mind, he had no expectations and anticipations; he just relied on the truths of Heaven to keep him steady and aware.

宗聖曾子曰：獨者，人所不知己所獨知之地也。其地是何？曰心。此心中藏得天理二字。吾夫子聖人也，吾夫子何由而至於聖？吾常侍吾夫子座前而暗體之，乃非有新奇異樣之修持，只此獨知之地，無一絲一毫他物參擾其際，只是天理二字住其間耳。人所共見之地，吾夫子到有隨機應變、委婉盡義之權衡。惟此獨知之地，到無一毫預料、一毫佈置之心思，只是天理守其境也。

Since I learned this from my teacher, I try hard to do the same. In every passing minute, I stand guard of my inner solitude, a place I only know about. I remind myself to stay alert. Each time a thought bubbles up, I warn myself, "Do not let it grow; all eyes are on me." When an intention comes up, I caution myself, "Hold it back; all fingers are pointing." I don't know if anyone is actually watching or pointing at me, but my mind acts like it is. The feeling of being watched and pointed at feels all too real. That kind of caution and fear fully wakes up my conscience.

因是吾得吾夫子修持之功，故由是力行，時時於人所不知、己所獨知之地，惕焉自警，一念來，則自警曰不可起是念，有十目視之也。一意生，則自警曰不可生是念，有十手指之也。我視之乎，人視之乎，無可考也。我指之乎，人指之乎，無從知乎。雖無從可考，雖無從可考，而我心作是警，直如實有其事，直如實有十手十目，指視其旁，戰戰兢兢，天良畢露。

Oh, this feeling! Could it be from a ghost, a spirit, someone else, or just me? Is there a spirit in this space? Or is it simply the truths of Heaven shining through me? When I look closer, I see no ghosts, divine spirits, or anyone else, not even myself. I can only sense the brilliant truths of Heaven inside me. It feels like the whole world is watching me and pointing at me. I dare not have any impure thoughts. When the light of Heaven's truths shines, all other thoughts fade away. That is when true awareness comes through. Since the truths of Heaven are so strict and intimate, how can I help others feel this inner light?

噫！鬼歟？神歟？我歟？人歟？室中之靈歟？心中之天理歟？細味其際，無鬼無神，無人無彼，只是我自己之天理發露，遂覺如人手之指、人目之視，不敢以隱暗之思起之心地。天理若昭，群思若掃，實能有如斯之警覺；天理既如是嚴密，以警覺人心發此天理其道在何？

To do so, I must show self-restraint. But what does that really mean? It means I need to step back from thinking about what I want and need, like my own benefits, advantages, pride, and comfort. It also means I should not judge others when they make mistakes, are rude, don't see things my way, or don't know what they are doing. And there is more to it! It even means I have to let go of thoughts about people being greedy, dishonest, sneaky, or fake. On a deeper level, it is about getting past those negative feelings towards those who do not do what I want, try to take what is mine, hurt my reputation, or compete with me for the same thing I want.

These thoughts come from my heart. They are all about me and my own interests. Whenever I see something I really want, everyone else wants it too, and we start competing for it. This makes me worry that someone else will get it before I do. In these moments, my mind subtly thinks of ways to fight for what I want, even if I don't realize it at first. I completely lose sight of what is fair and right, and those thoughts start to go out of control. Soon, they take over my mind. In the end, I forget how to stop them, and I lose that sacred sense of watchfulness I had before.

曰克己。己是何？我也。何謂克去盡之也？我思我益、我思我利、我思我榮、我思我逸；我思人之不是、我思人之非禮、我思人之不合、我思人之昧己，甚至，我思人之貪，我思人之欺，我思人之巧、我思人之詐、我思人之拂我意、我思人之奪我利、我思人之毀我名、我思人之爭我益。種種之思生之心地，此思皆己也，皆為我利也；為我利，人不容我取此利，則必與我來爭來奪，我恐此利為人爭、為人奪，則於獨知之地必將暗生種種抵制之法，以待臨事與彼抗衡。是以心之天理無力鎮掃群思。失之所止，遂群思畢集，亦弗能覺得十目十手之指視矣！

That is why I really have to work hard to keep myself in check. So, how do we learn to hold back when we need to? My teacher had a unique way. He focused on two key values: loyalty and empathy. Loyalty is all about caring for the people and things that matter to us, while empathy is about treating others the way we want to be treated. These values really show our sincerity and guide us in responding in the right way.

When I do my best, why should I stress about what everyone else is doing? If I take care of my mind, why should I worry about how others take care of theirs? When I do something for someone, I should think as if I am doing it for myself. So why should I be concerned about what others do for me? No matter what I think or do, I should first check how it feels to be on the receiving end. So really, why should it matter how others treat me?

My loyalty and empathy are mine to uphold. This is how I practice self-restraint. So, when I am alone, in that private space that belongs only to me, I can clear my thoughts and uncover the truths of Heaven. Even when I have fleeting desires, they often face away on their own and when they lay bare in the light of Heaven's truths. Before a thought fully forms, I should act like watchful spirits are around me. Before my mind starts to stir, I should think that others can see right into my mind. This way of thinking gives me the powerful feeling of all eyes on me and all fingers pointing at me. Anyone who wants to guard their inner solitude must learn to hold back their thoughts.

　　故克之功修要力。何以克？吾夫子之道無他，忠恕而已矣！何謂忠？盡己之心也；何謂恕？推己及人也。此忠此恕，即天理二字也，即內之誠意，外之盡理也。我盡我之心，何必思及於人？我管我之心，何必思及於彼？我施人要推之於我，何必思人之所施於我？我施人，先驗之於我，何必思人之所及於我？我管我之忠，我盡我之恕，如此而已矣。如此以守心地，則人所不知、己所獨知之處，掃淨群思天理畢露，雖再有微毫私念私心之起，則天理燭照，有不能自容者矣。故恆有念未動而有如鬼神伺其旁，心未起而有如人彼窺其際。十目十手，指視其間也。慎幽獨者還須先知克己。

Here is a video that introduces Zengzi's scripture.